THAILAND.

Sawadee Ka! or HELLO :) Last week I returned from the most beautiful place I have ever been to in my life. Thailand. Not only was this trip visually mind-blowing, but some of the days I had there were no doubt some of the best days of my life so far. I am still daydreaming about the experiences I had and probably will for many months to come... ahhhhh...

LET'S START FROM THE BEGINNING.

So the whole reason (as if you really need one) behind going to Thailand in the first place was to celebrate two friends of mine getting married! My boyfriend and I have been planning and looking forward to this trip for at least five or six months before we actually took off, so it was very exciting once I realized it was actually happening. FYI I haven't left the country since I was like 12 or 13 when I did a Euro trip with Grandma Forte. Not exactly the same Euro Trip as this one. No absinthe involved. Anyway, I was super excited to finally get a stamp in my adult passport. (And I got TWO, bitches!)

Here lies our OFFICIAL ITINERARY:
(with pictures, everyone loves pictures)

Thursday, March 7th
JFK --> (15 hours) Bejing --> (5/6 hours) Phuket

layover in Bejing is how I scored an extra stamp, in case you were wondering.

Saturday, March 9th
Phuket --> drive 1.5 hours --> Khao Lak

Sat, March 9 - Tues, March 12
JW Marriot, Khao Lak

If you're thinking I skipped a day, I didn't. It just takes a really long time to get there. Anyway! A group of us were picked up from the airport hotel where we stayed the night before and off we went. The drive to Khao Lak was sooo pretty. Everything I saw was totally foreign to me, and I loved it. I meant to take pictures, but I was so lost in the moment and in awe of everything around me that I just forgot. I did however capture our excited faces right as we took off on our drive.

This is also when we learned there are basically no rules in Thailand.

Upon arrival to the JW Marriott, I really had no expectations for what my day ahead looked like. I should also mention that the wedding we were on our way to attend was going to be a half American wedding and half traditional Indian wedding. The festivities were (as we thought) going to begin the next day, but to our surprise the celebration would begin as soon as we pulled up and stepped foot outside of that car...

We were welcomed by a staircase filled with beautiful Thai women dressed head to toe in gold. There were bongos being drummed, photographers snapping our photo, so many welcoming smiles. Then the next thing I knew I was at the top of the staircase with a woman putting a fresh lei around my neck and another woman applying red wax above the center of my eyebrows. After traveling for a day and a half straight, I'm not sure if I was delirious but I for sure felt like I was dreaming for a quick minute there. Once I floated back into my body I was offered a refreshing beverage before checking in. I was officially in Paradise, and this would be my home for the next three nights.

 

I don't get to brag about this kind of stuff very often so yeah, our room was pretty ballin'. This day we were greeted with a Welcome Lunch followed later with a Welcome Dinner which both consisted of an elaborate buffet of amazing food and cocktails. It was so apparent that the families of both the bride and groom were so incredibly happy to have us all there. You could really feel the love.

You could also feel the paparazzi. They were everywhere! 

Sunday, March 10th

The first ceremony - Indian style. 

I was sooooooo excited about this day. I love learning about other cultures and this was a rare opportunity to fully indulge. I had my outfit ready, but absolutely zero insight as to what to expect. So of course, I dove in head first. And so it began, with a man on a horse...

Rah looked like he was born for this moment. He was so happy.

Whistles and clappers were going crazy with their sounds. Drums were being played. Everyone was cheering. This dance party turned into a moving parade until we all had fully migrated to the beachfront ceremony that looked like this: 

Yep.

I'm pretty sure everyone who saw this that wasn't attending the wedding must have thought they were a prince and princess or something. It was unreal. 

Oh yeah, and this is how we looked:

So many COLORS! Anywho - followed by the beach ceremony was another massive dinner followed by performances followed by an all-night after party that I think I might just keep off the blog. Some things are just too priceless to share with the world ;)

Monday, March 11th

Daytime Pool Party + American Wedding Ceremony

This was the last night of wedding festivities along with being our last night in Khao Lak. The pool party was just straight GOOD VIBES. We were serenaded all afternoon by a violinist, a sax player, and a guy on the bongos. The weather was perfect. The bar was open. The people were groovin'. It looked a little somethin' like this:

 

And the nighttime... Oh man, the nighttime...

It was beautiful in so many ways.

The experiences I had here in the South of Thailand were like something out of a dream. It is a place and time that I could never forget. And to my friends, who's love we celebrated, I wish you the best that life has to offer and a life of never-ending happiness together. I love you guys!

**********************************************************************

The next part of my trip is where I got to see Thailand for real. 

Tuesday, March 12th

Phuket --> Chiang Mai

Now, for those of you who don't know, Chiang Mai is the most culturally significant part of Thailand. It's about a two hour flight from Phuket and a completely different part of the country than we had just experienced. Our hotel alone was entirely different, but also totally beautiful. Surrounded by green and flowers I had never seen before, this was now our home for the next three nights...

^ The Lobby - Upon arrival we were greeted by the cutest little Thai lady named Nita. She greeted us with tea and a cold towel. She was so sweet! Insta-love.

^ This is outside our room, which I thought of as our oasis.

Wednesday, March 13th

Quite possibly the best day of my life. If not, then it was DEFINITELY in the top five.

So before I begin here, let me just point out that the following events ALL took place in the same day. It's crazy, I know. But this seriously happened. Before it all went down, we had plans to start our morning off with an elephant tour at 8am and kept the rest of the day sort of tentatively planned.

On our way to see the elephants, a man named Tom picked us up. In some of the best English we have heard a native speak thus far, he introduced himself along with our driver named "Beer". Tom and Beer were definitely my kind of dudes. Tom tells us on our way to see the elephants that it is National Elephant Day of Thailand! SERIOUSLY??? How the hell did we get so lucky to happen to land in Thailand and decide to unknowingly go see elephants on their national holiday.

DUMB LUCK.

I was already excited, but this just pushed me over the edge. Oh, and he also said that on our way to the elephant party (in my head everything that had to do with elephants from this moment forward was known as "the elephant party") we would be stopping at a butterfly farm and orchid sanctuary. 

PERFECT. 

And so our day unfolded as follows...

First stop: The Orchid Sanctuary

Next, butterflies:

Then of course, THE ELEPHANTS!

I fed them. They eat bananas by the bunch! They also love giving hugs.

I watched several of them paint with their noses!

Elephants are crazy talented.

So next, we just HAD to ride one. Wouldn't you???

Our elephant was named Billy. He's 32. FYI: Elephants live to be about the age of 80 and they can have about 5-6 kids in their lifetime, similar to humans.

Elephant day in Thailand grants the elephants a massive buffet of food. We didn't get to see them devour all of this yumminess, but I still managed to snap a photo of the feast:

Post elephant party, it was barely noon, so we thought that shooting guns in the wild obviously was the next thing to do. And so we did.

In Thailand they don't even ask for identification when letting you use one of their guns. They actually barely look at your face. They just take your money and say, "pick one".

We each picked a .45 mm and it was awesome.

Next up, we found our way to Tiger Kingdom where my dreams literally came true. I'm not sure if it was my childhood obsession with Aladdin, but my entire life I had dreams of one day being able to pet a tiger and share a moment with this beautiful creature. 

and holy bananas, DREAMS CAN COME TRUE!!!

But ^^ these were only the small cats. It was a strategy to ease in for the big boys.

Since sharing pictures of my tiger experience with friends, I have been asked a lot if the tigers were sedated. So if you are wondering the same - I will say that I would assume they must have been, given the fact that I basically spooned one and he didn't eat my face off. But, they were still fully alert and would occasionally get up and look around and you internally freak the FUCK out.

Here is what happened when we met the big cats:

Okay so in the moment, I kinda felt like I was playing with a big kitty. Looking back, I'm like HOLY SHIT BALLS! Did I really do that?!?

I think that's kinda how life is though, ya know?

Later that night we met up with friends we were traveling with along with a friend who happened to be traveling in Chiang Mai at the same time...

What an incredible day. The earrings I'm wearing in this photo are actually made from orchid petals taken from the orchid sanctuary we had been to earlier that day.

Thursday, March 14th

last full day in Chiang Mai

Our morning started at 7am as we embarked on a two hour drive up into the mountains where we would be ziplining through the Thai jungle for two and a half hours. My boyfriend and I signed up with a tour group to do this. Our group consisted of a dude from London (who soon became a friend of ours) and five other people from China who spoke zero english. They just laughed a lot.

Here is what we experienced:

It was prettay, prettay, prettay awesome.

So overall, you can see that my first trip to Thailand as well as my first trip to Asia was no doubt a great one. The last night we had was coincidentally my boyfriends 26th birthday so let me just tell you - we did it right, the best way you could possibly bring in a birthday in a foreign country.

We drank.

We watched Muay Thai.

We drank some more.

We met up with our friends.

We made friends.

We partied with ladies and lady-boys.

We were pretty sure they were also hookers.

I picked one up, literally.

and I realized, that this was only the beginning...

I am 25 years old. I have my ENTIRE future ahead of me. We live on this amazing planet and this trip to Thailand has just awoken my traveling spirit. I will see this world. I will see it all.

But until I see all that I want to see... I feel completely blessed to have had the experiences that took place on this trip. I came back to New York with a new sense of peace. I feel calm. I feel refreshed. I feel so appreciative of everything around me.

I feel alive.

And if you have read through this entire blog post and shared along with me, I encourage you to come visit this beautiful country as well. The country itself is incredibly gorgeous. But also, the people are genuine. They are beautiful inside and out. I fell in love with a place for the first time in my life and I am so happy to share my experience with anyone who cares to read about it. I love this life.

SWAAHAA!!!

Farewell February, Hello March.

February was kind of a weird month for me. Was it weird for you guys too? Anyway I could not be happier to be beginning a new month - and to being just that much closer to Spring time! Spring is one of my faves when it comes to NYC livin'. The clothes get cuter, the restaurants start setting up their outdoor seating, the clothes get cuter, there are so many more fun outdoor activities, more outdoor shows, did I mention the clothes get cuter? Okay I don't know if it's some California stigma that I hold but I am seriously so over wearing a F-ing coat every day.

BRING ME SUNSHINE!

Whew, okay. Glad I got that out. Anyway despite the w e i r d n e s s , a lot of really cool things actually happened in February. I got to see my dad who I hadn't seen in over a YEAR! Which, even given the 3,000 mile difference between us is still a pretty long time. I was blessed with a pretty awesome family so whatever bonding time I can get with them makes me really happy. (Gotta love your fam, man.) Anyway :bonus: I got to see him in sunny Palm Springs where I was able to escape to from NYC for a few days. The weather was totally perfect, just like I dreamt it would be. I mean, the night before. I literally had a dream about it. Anyway! I had the absolute BEST time in the two days that I got to spend with him and my step-mom. We drank, we sang songs, we ate a lot, we laughed a lot, we got real. It was awesome.

Oh yeah! Annnnnnd, I went treasure hunting. That's right. Maybe not the kind you know, but to me - the stuff I found was pure gold. In the garage of my dad's house there are a few boxes that basically hold any and everything that I have ever made or kept that was important to me in my life. I haven't looked through this stuff in YEARS. I waited until I had a couple glasses of wine, and went in...

There were plenty of things in these magic boxes that were highly entertaining to me, but would mean absolutely nothing to you. So, I chose a few things that I thought the average stranger might also find amusing.

FIRST:

I had almost forgotten how much I use to play "dress up" with myself as a kid. I used to create various "looks" that each went along with a different character I had created in my mind. I must be about eleven years old in these photos. 

"Dare Girl" 

Drug free and a total nerd. (Those glasses were not prescription.) And yes, those are silk boxers.

***

...Then one time, my sister and I bought a crimping iron (a.k.a. crimper), because it was obviously really cool, and this happened:

Take a minute. Soak it in. This is really me, and you are so judging my five-head right now, aren't you?

It's okay. It was a pretty ridiculous time looks-wise for me, and I think this look was real life.

***

And alas, the original selfie. Taken with a film camera.

Clearly, I was way ahead of my time.

***

I really wish that I kept a journal more consistently throughout my life. I do it when I can now, but I doubt what I read in fifteen years from now will be as ridiculous as some of the entries I found from fifteen years ago. These were the first few lines of my "Private Diary" that I kept in 1998.

Secrets out. Sorry Jess.

~*wink*~

Ohhhh to be a kid again...but back to adulthood! I should mention that the reason I went out to Palm Springs in the first place was to see two of my closest friends get hitched. This was my first time going to a wedding as an adult and holy balls, weddings are SO MUCH FUN. At the Ace Hotel, the night was filled with great friends, so much family, amazing energy, dancing, and LOVE. And the best part of the whole entire night was the fact that at the end of it all, this happened:

it was GLORIOUS! 

It's rare moments like these that we get in life that will forever be priceless. Treasure every second. Next week I will be taking off on another incredible journey to Thailand to see two more great friends tie the knot and celebrate their lives coming together. I will no doubt blog about my adventure upon my return!

In the meantime, happy March to you all! I hope this month brings everyone great things. I leave you with this: (and don't you ever stop)

When You Find It, You'll Know.

A GUIDE TO FINDING LOVE IN YOUR TWENTIES (or, whenever):

So this may make some of you upset, but we need to get this out of the way so I am just going to come out and say it: there is no such thing as soul mates. (Gasp!) But seriously. ELIMINATE THAT THOUGHT FROM YOUR (pretty, little) HEAD. I hear more and more women talking about how they wonder if they will ever find "the one" and I just want to shake each of them and scream, NO! Let's think about this for one second, logically. There are about, oh I don't know, a gazillion people that live on this planet - give or take. If you honestly believe that out of those GAZILLIONS of men and women on this Earth, there can only be one... then you better hope that fate would have him be your next door neighbor. Otherwise you are pretty much fucked. 

So if I just crushed your dreams of finding your one true love, I apologize, but also - don't worry because things are about to get a lot better for you. By accepting that your one, pre-determined, soul mate is actually about as real as Manti Te'o's girlfriend, you can move forward in your search of finding something that I absolutely do know to exist: love.

Awww.

But on the real, if you haven't found it yet. I promise you it exists. I know this because believe it or not I have actually found it twice now (which also further proves my original point). If you haven't found it yet and are roaming solo somewhere in your twenties or thirties, then the odds are that the reason behind your singledom lies with your identifying with one of the following statements: 

#1 - Something is wrong with me.

You can't hold one down it seems. You repeatedly find yourself in almost-relationships and always are left wondering what happened after it doesn't work out, yet again. 

"Was it something I did?"

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Was I not pretty enough?"

"Not skinny enough?"

"Maybe he liked me too much, and couldn't handle it. Yeah. Yeah, that's totally gotta be it."

If you were thinking that last one, then yes, something is wrong with you, you crazy biatch! But if you had thoughts similar to the first four, then I am here to tell you that chances are... you are not the problem. The only problem (whether you want to believe it or not) is that you two were simply not right for each other. 

Remember all that "gazillion talk" before? Well that equates to the fact that as many people that can be "right" for you out there, there can also be that many people that are wrong for you too. And unfortunately, sometimes we have to date some of the wrong ones in order to filter through to find the right one(s). Ya feel me?

So the next time a promising partnership doesn't work out in your favor, ask yourself questions like:

"What was really missing in this relationship?" (keep it real with yourself)

"What do I need that I'm not getting?"
(TIP: sometimes it is okay to be selfish - especially in finding exactly what you want)

Now take the answers to those questions, and look for those things in your next relationship. Isn't that the point of dating anyway?

#2 - I know what I want, and I am starting to believe this person doesn't exist.

Well, let me first congratulate you on knowing what you want. You are one step ahead of most! Congrats, friend. Now if this is you, then I have a feeling you've made the classic mistake of "too many advanced search options". You've over-narrowed. It's great that you know exactly what you want in a significant other, but if you have been searching and searching... and searching only to find that every single pursuit ends up being a couple of checked boxes short of your perfect person, then I want you to ask yourself this question - Is what I'm looking for reasonable? Because Heidi and Seal were like a seriously special case and they didn't end up working out in the long run anyway... (still a little sad about this).

So here are some DO's and DON'T's to help you refresh -

DO: seek qualities that people actually have (i.e. good heart, funny, romantic, adventurous, etc.)

DON'T: look for circumstances (i.e. someone from a small town, someone with green eyes, someone who is a specific height, someone who was brought up with $$$, etc.) These are all things that are out of a person's control. When you eliminate looking for these specific circumstances and open yourself to dating a little outside of what may be ideal, you might really surprise yourself in what you find.

DO: know your deal-breakers. We've all got em. I'll tell you right now mine are: liars (if you lie to me once, you'll lie to me twice, and I will always know when you're lying), someone with substance abuse (nuh uh not here no sir), someone stinky (I like a man who showers), and the big one - someone who doesn't get along with my family and best friends. By understanding what you don't want, it is much easier to get clear on what you do want. Kapeesh?

DON'T: compare yourself to your friends. Every single relationship is different and you should never ever ever compare yourself to your friends' relationships. Also, if they are happy - be happy for them!

DO: keep an open mind. All people have beauty inside of them.

DON'T: get discouraged. It sucks as much as it is true that those crazy, intense, once-in-a-lifetime loves typically only show up when you aren't actively devoting your life to finding them. The universe is a bitch like that. But it's soo true! so...

DO: enjoy your life as a single human being! Right now you are a free bird and it may not always be that way (or we should hope). So travel! if you want to. Take a class somewhere. Go on a retreat. Do whatever the hell you feel like doing because you are single and fabulous. And think, maybe if you put yourself in situations where you're doing things that you like doing, you might actually find someone who enjoys those same things too. Hmmmmmm....

#3 - Marriage is for idiots.

Alright. I toootally understand that with more than half of our generation's parents' marriages ending in divorce, it can be a little discouraging when thinking about our own futures with someone. And also, maybe you are pretty sure that half of all your married or soon-to-be-married friends will also end in divorce because they got married too young, to the wrong person, or simply because marriage is for idiots. Well, maybe some will end sourly, but if our generation keeps going through life with this mindset, then how are we EVER going to believe in the possibility of a life-long happiness with someone?

Oh, wait - I know how! Listen up, because it is very simple:

We can be the game-changer. Yep, really that simple. You know why? Because we are the example now.

Our generation literally has the power the restore the sanctity of marriage once again. Think about it! If your grandparents are still alive, chances are they are still married. Am I right? Okay so go with me on this one... they were the example set for our parents (and yeah I know it was different back then because people just didn't get divorced and It was just the way it was, yada yada). Regardless, the fact that most of our parents marriages ended unsuccessfully after being brought up with two married parents - it would seem as though their generation almost rebelled against it. (Maybe because they saw two unhappy people that were staying together just because they were obligated to and didn't want that for the rest of their life?)

Wow guys, we are getting deep here. Okay stay with me on this one...

My point is, each generation learns from watching how our parents lived and we all hope to do better when we become parents. So in theory, each generation pretty much gets better at life. Ya dig? So for every person that grew up with divorced parents early on, the chances are that you probably don't want to bring your kids up in the same way. So the odds of you taking your time and finding someone that you are 115% sure is right for you, are much greater. So naturally, we'll have more successful marriages and long-term relationships. Ta-da!

Plus! It's 2013. Men are marrying men. Women are marrying women. The love is spreading, people! And people are getting so excited about just being ABLE to get married.

So if you are totally anti M-word, and truly never want to get married, then power to you. It is not for everyone! But if you do, kinda-sorta, maybe one day want to get married - just know that great relationships do exist. So don't fear your future. Give it a whirl.

#4 - I am way too busy.

I will keep this one short and sweet: if Jay-Z and Beyonce can find the time to make it work, then I'm sure you can figure something out.

The trick is just knowing how to prioritize your time. Don't waste your time, energy, money on guys or girls that you know in your gut aren't right for you anyway. When you find someone that is, you'll know - and you will magically find time for this person. Trust me. In the meantime, focus on whatever it is that is keeping you so busy - you busy bee!

#5 - I have literally dated everyone.

You've dated absolutely every genre of man (or woman) that lives in your direct area and are one cheesecake away from completely falling off the dating wagon and giving up. I've been there my friend. I've been there. It can be frustrating at times, especially when you know you are a total catch and everyone that you seem to find yourself on dates with is a total lehu-zehur (said in Ace Ventura voice).

Don't give up just yet!

Because there are (actually!) plenty of ways that you can still meet interesting people organically these days. Here are some suggestions:

1. Go for a walk. (whaaa? so simple?) yep! Get your cute little butt outside of the house and go for a walk through a nearby park, a local beach, a random neighborhood, whatever. Get moving and see where your legs take you. You never know who you might meet along the way.

2. Have a dog? (refer to #1) or hit a dog park. The "omg your dog is so cute, whats his/her name?" is a pretty easy opening line and gateway to conversation if you're both feelin' it.

3. Take a class. Check out Groupon or LivingSocial for discounts on fun classes in your area. You never know who you might meet while learning to make pizzas from scratch or how to salsa dance.

4. Get a gym pass. People are attracted to people who take care of themselves. So take care of yourself and see who finds you at the gymnasium. Plus, working out is fun and makes you feel all sexy and stuff. GETCHA SOME.

and if you are looking for something a little less-organic...

5. There is always the option of online dating. I know plenty of people who have actually found really successful relationships from people they have met online. So don't discount it. In fact, I am going to share a little secret with you... (I met my boyfriend online). (Omergerd!). It's true. And I am super happy too. My man is totally wonderful, beautiful, and could not be a better fit for me.

Seriously though, are we not the cutest?

So there you have it boys and girls! I hope my guide to finding love in your twenties helped you in one way or another. Just remember to always trust yourself no matter what and that when you find whatever it is that you are looking for, you'll know.